How to make a free t-shirt that nobody will wear

Free t-shirts are still one of the most powerful and cheap incentives out there. People go nuts for these things.

Having said that, plenty of people seem to know how to make shirts that nobody will wear. If you’d like to join them, here are some rules you’ll need to know:

  1. Make only one size of the shirt – preferably XXXL.
  2. Use a ridiculous color, like blazing green. Bonus points for using pink font. Double bonus for making the shirt feel like a damn optical illusion when trying to read it.
  3. Use sandpaper-like fabric. Make the shirt feel real cheap and uncomfortable.
  4. Understand that great design is overrated. Don’t waste money on that crap.
  5. Assume people will want to wear a shirt with your giant logo on it.
  6. If you have copy on your shirt, play it safe.
  7. Don’t bother with 1:1 marketing techniques or those WOW! shenanigans. Putting personal things like last names on shirts would be a lot of work.
  8. Find a way to make the free t-shirt very expensive. Make sure it costs a lot of time or a lot of effort or a lot of personal information to get it. When you do finally give a shirt away, spam anybody who took one relentlessly.

So there’s a healthy dose of sarcasm for you, but I never understood why people hand out lousy t-shirts.

If nobody is going to wear it, why bother? If people do actually wear it and it looks like crap, why bother?

Why waste your money? Or – why reveal your lack of creativity and how boring you are on a thousand mobile billboards?

Then again, on the other hand, the free t-shirt represents a significant opportunity.

I’m guessing you’ve got some great examples buried in a drawer deep in your closet somewhere, what could be added to this list? Bonus points for sending a photo of it.

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1 Comment

Filed under Branding, Marketing

One response to “How to make a free t-shirt that nobody will wear

  1. Pingback: Unwearable Free Shirts : My Secret Side Biz

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